Not Neal. When asked, he can’t immediately remember the number. He stops and counts before he answers a question about how many of his children are adopted.

Likewise, Betty completely forgot to raise her hand when the speaker asked who in the room had adopted a child.

She has no photographs of her son’s first years because she wasn’t there. She has no record of his first smile or those beginning, tentative steps because she adopted him from the Kansas foster care system.

When the meeting was over I asked, “Why didn’t you raise your hand to indicate you’re an adoptive mom?”

She looked surprised for a moment and then she said, “Oh, that’s right, I am!”

Someone very much like my friend Neal and my sister Betty wrote this poem.