On a day in 2001 that most Americans remember very well, the phones in our office were silent. That lasted for about a week. And then they began to ring.

We put on brave faces and carried out our regularly scheduled fund raising activities, pushing ourselves through the depression that seemed to have gripped the spirits of people all around us.

All along the phones were ringing.

We gulped as each initiative raised less money than we needed in order to meet expenses, while the phones kept ringing. “Tell me how to adopt.”

With each phone call came a surge of energy. We’re not down. We’re sad, and we’re hurting. But we’re not down! The Adoption Exchange made it through the financial scrapes and bruises. And we saw adoptions increase by 5% in the months following 9/11.

Seven years later – just about the time people were beginning to let go of their fears – came the economic crisis that brought our financial institutions to their knees.

But the phones kept ringing. Our email in-boxes were flooded. And here at The Adoption Exchange we counted a 20% increase in adoptions.

What does this mean?

In order to understand patterns of behavior Heifetz, Grashow and Linsky* recommend using a mental technique of “standing on a balcony” to observe.

What I see when I stand on the balcony is this – adoption is one of the ways society renews itself. In concrete ways adoption creates new starts after tragic mistakes have been made. Adoption alters the outcome of quarrels between family members, cultures and nations.

Funny. They don’t dress like the gurus in the movies. But it’s as if adoptive parents – these wise givers of hope – are saying, “Pay attention! Don’t get distracted by things like the economy and hypes of terrorist attacks, or prejudice. Don’t be afraid. Look at the future. See the children.”

You can see some of the children here.

Marlene loves to volunteer at Boondocks. She was once an adoption social worker, and she takes delight in being with the children and prospective parents. I’ve never met a more dedicated advocate. If things don’t work, Marlene wants to know why and what can be done to fix them so they do work.

Last spring Marlene felt her heart drop when she spotted a boy she recognized. Hadn’t she seen him at prior parties? What must it be like for him?

Marlene tells me that she introduced herself and asked this boy if she hadn’t seen him at other parties in past years.

He smiled and said, “Yes, we come to every party! My parents bring the foster children who are living with us. And they always get adopted.”

I’ve got a reason for you to smile: At an adoption party in July I overheard Gregory talking to some people. When they asked where he went to school, his response was a real conversation stopper.

He said, “I don’t know where I will go this year. It depends on whether my foster mom quits.”

The very next month – Gregory was adopted! Now he doesn’t have to worry about whether this mom is going to “quit” and he knows where he’ll be going to school.

And here’s another one: Cathleen was still 10 years old when told a TV reporter on Wednesday’s Child that she wants to be a cowgirl or a veterinarian. She said, “I want lots of hugs and kisses….to be tucked in at night.”

Several months later Cathleen got her wish.

I know you don’t have time to read about them all, but we have lots of reasons to smile – for Gregory and over 6,000 others.

Twenty-seven years ago I was the person who answered the phone when people called our office to inquire about children they’d seen on Wednesday’s Child.

“All he needs is love,” they’d say.

I’d respond back with something like, “Well, he sure does need love. But he also is going to need psychotherapy and probably some tutoring and maybe special education….and…..”

Then the caller would usually interrupt me and say, “Yes, but what he really needs is love, right?”

Lately I’ve come to the conclusion that they were right all along. It really is that simple.

It’s love for a child that causes a parent to change jobs in order to be more available. It is love that prompts a mom or dad to find the right school for their children. Or to drive across town and sit in a therapist’s waiting room for an hour two or three times a week while their child is getting much needed help. And love makes them drive back again to meet with the therapists themselves.

Love changes the one who is loved, and it certainly changes the one who does the loving. As the song says, “Love changes everything. . . Love will never ever let you be the same.” Love makes us change the way we do familiar things and makes us try new things we’d never considered before.

It causes parents to accept children just the way they are and then move mountains to get them all of the needed remedial resources so that they can become what is possible for them.

Today, if you ask me about any one of the waiting children, I’ll say, “Yep. It’s pretty straightforward, really. All he needs is love.”

To view recent Wednesday’s Child features click here.

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